Ever being in a toxic relationship before? By toxic, I don’t necessarily mean physically abusive. There are so many kinds of toxicity. Verbal abuse, mental abuse, narcissistic traits, control, being demeaned and so many more are types of toxic relationships.
What I know about toxic relationships is that you lose your self esteem and confidence. You’re demeaned so much that you think that’s how it is or should be. You become a shell of your former self, the glow and beauty you hard prior fades away. You dedicate your life into pleasing that person that you forget all about yourself.
It’s hard to get out such relationships. You deam yourself unlovable, cause that’s what you’ve been feeling all along. You think that all relationships might be the same. You have no expectations for anything different out there and are always thinking of the worst case scenario in every situation.
You won’t even know what a healthy relationship is. You’ll feel like it’s all a pretense and keep waiting for things to blow up. You’ve built your walls so high that no one can climb them. Your defences are so high and it’ll take so much determination to break through that. You’ve to start unlearning all that you learnt to protect yourself back then. All the coping mechanisms have to be dropped and you’ve to believe that you can genuinely be treated well. It’s not always a facade waiting to blow up. Some people are generally good and you can genuinely feel safe around them.
It takes time, I know but be kind to yourself and give yourself that chance.
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